It is so much easier to talk about life than to live it. How easily I can write a quick - though heartfelt - response to someone on Facebook or share a word of encouragement with a friend. But does it show just how hard the days and years were in getting to that place of faith or victory? Does it reflect compassion for the one in the battle now? Does it even begin to communicate just how deep and wrenching some of the pain has been?
There were days when I thought I would die. There were days when I could not breath. There were days when all I could do was cry...and cry out. Life is real and messy, full of plot twists, expected and unexpected. There are not always tidy answers for untidy days. But in the fray of all this, and in the tossing seas of new hard things on my horizon, I will confidently say that there is hope, there is a Healer, there is a source of strength. We don't have to do any of this alone. And I will also say that, yes, it is hard and exhausting and grievous some days, weeks, years.
Today is a crying and crying out day. Hope fully anchored, but heart hurting anyway. And it is ok to not be ok today. Jesus is here. He knows. He cares. "He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart..." (Isaiah 40:11) I love that picture. Thank you for holding me, Jesus.
There's room there for you, too. Just cry out. His arms are strong, His love is perfect.
"My heart and my flesh may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever."
Psalm 73:26
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